The Water Fountain
by CathyNewstead
Summary: When the past begins to catch up with Helen, will she be able to accept it and move on? Or will she be stuck there forever? M for future chapters The timelines for the film are all wrong in general, so this is essentially an AU where it's all been fixed to make more sense...
1. Ch1 Insomnia

Helen jolted awake, clutching her throat, from what could only be described as an incredibly restless sleep. Her breathing was shallow and heavy as she tried to pull herself back from the disorientation of waking up in such a distraught state, once again. As she loosened her hand clutching her throat, she felt the sweat beading on her chest and just how clammy her skin was. He still frantic eyes searched the room that she had woken up in, in an attempt to ground herself from panic that had set in.

The room was dark and cool, with a gentle breeze coming through the wide open window to her left. Ahead of her was the door to the room that lead through to the rest of the house. It was slightly ajar and she could see light creeping in from the nightlight in the hallway, there in case either of the kids needed it in the night. To her right she could feel a large presence, still snoring quietly. She concentrated on the sounds coming from her sleeping husband and trained her breathing to them in a final attempt to calm herself.

She pulled her legs up to her chest as she felt her eyes sting from the tears that were inevitably about to start spilling from them. Her whole body began to shake as she tried her hardest to force away the fear and pain that were still present in her mind. Swinging her legs over the side of the bed, she wrapped her arms around her body several times, trying to comfort herself further. Her head slumped forward as she took another deep, shaky breathe. "C'mon… Pull yourself together… Please, god damn it…" She whispered to herself quietly, hoping to not disturb her husband.

No such luck, she felt him stir beside her. She sat there, as still as she possibly could while her body was still shaking. A moment of silence passed within the room, the only sound being the gentle pat of her tears falling from her face and onto her bare thigh. In reality, the sound was barely even audible. But, in her head, it was a deafening sound that echoed through her head as she tried with all her willpower to fight them off. Convincing herself that her husband had slipped back into a deep sleep, she allowed herself to contract her stretched arms from around her body as she brought her hands to her sweaty face.

Bad dream again?" The sleepy voice made her jump far more than it should have, before she pulled herself back to reality. Staying unnaturally still, in an attempt to force her still shaking body to steady itself, Helen took a deep breath.  
"Uh huh, sorry I woke you honey… I didn't mean to…" She replied far more timidly than she had intended. She heard Bob reach over to the nightstand and clumsily hit the clock on the side, illuminating the room with the bright red glow that it emitted.  
"Helen, don't worry about waking me up. I just wish you could get some sleep…" He paused and sighed. "I mean, it's 3.20am and this is what? The 3rd time you've woken up tonight? Will you _please_ tell me what's bothering you?" Helen closed her eyes painfully tight, hoping that it would stop anymore tears from escaping her. She subtlety wiped her face as she turned round to face her sleep drunk husband. She pulled on her best fake smile that she used to try and convince the kids things were okay when she was upset.  
"Don't worry, just having a bad night… Think I must have had too much coffee before bed is all…" She was lying. Lying through her teeth. But she hoped Bob was still sleepy enough to not notice. The bed flexed as she felt him roll over to face her.  
"Helen, that was the excuse last time… The time before that you ate cheese too close to bed… Which is still don't believe is a thing by the way!" He paused and looked her in the eye. " _Please_ just tell me what's bothering you…" She could see his eyes were full of concern. Sleepy concern, but concern all the same. She placed a hand on the side of Bobs face.  
"Hey, honestly, I'm okay… I'm going to go and get some water. You go back to sleep and I'll be back in a minute, promise."

She pulled her robe around her as she headed into the hallway. She knew if she waited a few minutes Bob would go back to sleep and she wouldn't have to go back. Sleep wasn't coming tonight, that was easy to accept at this point.


	2. Ch2 Frozen

The wind was icy cold against her face, but the sun was bright and warm. She was up high above the clouds as she attempted to get her bearings in this unfamiliar situation. She couldn't fly, that wasn't something she was gifted with… Yet, here she was, so high in the sky that even the birds weren't around anymore. The clouds were dense all around her with a beautiful pink hue cast over them from the setting sun on the horizon. Behind her, she could hear a roaring sound that seemed to be getting closer. As she managed to pull herself round to look in the direction the sound was coming from, she found herself face to face with a passenger plane that was parting the clouds like candyfloss.

The realisation of where she was dawned on her and panic began to set in.

Frantic eyes scanned the plane as she saw a trail of smoke emerging from somewhere. Through the windows of the plane she could see the passengers looking out onto the engine on the wing closest to her. The plume of black smoke was billowing now and it was only a matter of time before the engine blew entirely. She tried to fight against the invisible force that was keeping her on her trajectory, hoping that something would give and she would have chance to help the situation. But it was no use. She tried extending her arms towards the plane, but again with no luck. She was completely helpless to the situation.

Helen began to scan the sky surrounding them, searching for anyone that may be able to help. Another plane nearby? A chopper? Even another Super! She could see the passengers becoming more and more panicked as the seconds crept agonisingly by, with oxygen masks now being deployed from overhead.

She knew what was coming. She knew the outcome of this situation. She knew, no matter how hard she tried, there was no changing what was about to unfold in front of her.

Sure enough, the familiar sound of the jet engine kick starting back into life echoed through her head. emOh god, no. /emThe smoke dissipated into the air and the plane began to level out. emPlease, not again. /emShe pulled and pulled against her invisible constraints in attempt to break free and stop the progression of what she knew was about to happen.

A shadow emerged from behind the jet engine, silhouetted against the pinks and purples thrown by the nearly set sun. The passengers could all be seen cheering at the windows and children were glued to them, waving frantically. Her breath hitched in her throat as a lump began to form that made it difficult for her to breathe. She fought as hard as she could, but nothing would budge her from where she was. She was completely frozen in place, with no one even aware of her presence. The shadowed figure came into full view and she stopped struggling, she knew what was coming. The purple suit with white accents, the long brunette ponytail, the cape flowing in the aggressive wind that came with being at such a height above the clouds.

She tried to call out and warn the figure that was now soaring level with the passengers in the plane, waving to all the children. She tried with every ounce of energy that she had, just to make a noise to gain some attention, but it was no use. This world seemed completely oblivious to her very existence, it was impossible to change the course of events she knew was about to unfold before her. The event she had lived through so many times and spent so long forcing herself to get over. Despite knowing she could not get the figures attention, she was screaming. Screaming to the point her voice was breaking through the strain. Screaming to the point that she couldn't breathe. Screaming to the point that she was near hysterical.

The figure glided effortlessly through the air, still making every effort to address every child on the plane. Not just there to save the day, but doing everything they could to make everyone happy too. Time began to slow down as the figure changed direction by a fraction of an inch. Helen knew what was about to happen, she tried to look away but her body wasn't doing what her brain told it to. The figure began to soar further away from the fuselage of the plane, towards the open sky to head off to save the day somewhere else. To make more people happy.

As the figure crossed over the front of the jet they had just repaired, their face began panicked. The cape. The jet. Helen knew what was happening and she knew she couldn't stop it. She saw the panic in the young girls face as she frantically tried to detach the cape from the rest of her suit. Passengers began to panic again inside the plane as the realisation of the situation dawned on them. The girl looked towards the plane, wide eyed as she knew what was about to happen and what they were about to see. She looked directly at the still frozen Helen, eyes still wide with shock but clouded over by what seemed like immense sadness.

"Helen! I can't-"

The 5 seconds it took for the inevitable to happen seemed to take an age to go by, and just like that it was over.


	3. Ch3 Hard Times

Helen pulled a stool up to the kitchen island, phone in hand as she rubbed her ridiculously tired eyes. Three children hadn't even made her this tired, lack of sleep was slowly driving her insane. The nightmares had been going on for weeks now, she had only managed at most 3 hours of sleep each night. And it was quickly wearing her down now. Every part of her was tired. Her body was exhausted, her hair was just a mess and her skin had lost it's usual glow. She ran a hand through her hair as she dialled the number written on the address book infront of her and waited for the dial tone to ring.

The line clicked as it was answered at the other end.

" _Hello? Who is it?"  
_ "Hey E, it's Helen…"  
" _Who?"  
_ "Helen, Helen Parr…"  
" _Helen…"_

She sighed to herself, the woman she was calling had no social skills when it came to normal people. It was almost as if she only had time for Supers. She hated using her superhero name when she didn't have to, this was one of those times… She must have told Edna her real name at least a hundred times by now, but it seemed to go in one ear and straight out the other. Clearing her throat, she replied to the woman in an exasperated tone…

"Elastigirl, E. It's Elastigirl…"  
" _DARLING! Yes, of course! How ARE you?!"  
_ "It's not a difficult name to remember, E…"  
" _Darling, if I remembered 2 names for everyone I do business with I would have no room in my brain for my creative genius to grow!"  
_ "Right… My bad…"

There was a pause on the end of the phone and she could almost hear the cogs turning in Ednas head as she muttered her feeble response.

" _You sound deflated. I sense a reason for your call, aside from the standard idle chitchat…"_

She paused and shakily inhaled before speaking again. Her voice suddenly fitting the description of being deflated. She rested her head in her free hand and rubbed at her eyes.

"I need help E, I'm not sleeping again…"  
" _Darling, I am and inventor! A Designer! An artist! I do not have the answers to such problems!"_

There was another pause on the line between the two women. Edna was always on the more over dramatic side, but she seemed to be _extra_ today. Helen was beginning to wonder if it was the best idea to call the eccentric designer after all. The voice on the other end bought her back from her thoughts.

" _But, I confess, neither have I as of late…"  
_ "This time of year is tough for all of us I guess."  
" _For you especially, my dear."_

Ednas words caused Helens chest to tighten and her eyes scrunch tighter shut. She thought back to how all this began. How she went from being one of the most confident and highly functioning supers around, to broken and virtually unresponsive to life. The whole time was a massive blur, but she remembered turning up at the smaller womans ridiculous mansion in the middle of the night, with the news of what had happened. How they sat up for the rest of the night in complete silence, their only company being the sound of the rather ironic thunderstorm - that had began shortly after the tragic events of that day had unfolded. For the few months that followed, she stayed with Edna, life wasn't something she could face. They made up an excuse for her absence from the super scene, something about a new technological collaboration she would be helping Edna with. She was very protective of Helen throughout her stay, she was one of the few people who fully knew the reasons behind her immense sadness. Even when tensions arose between Helen and Bob, due to her being away from home for so long, she was able to defuse the situation and hurry him on his way. At the time, Helen had hoped that was it between them, that the breakdown was enough to drive him away for good. She knew now that that was a ridiculous thought that was bought on by the grief she was feeling. Who knows where she would be now if she didn't have him to go home to within those months.

Suddenly aware of the silence that was again present between them, she snapped back into consciousness and cleared her throat.

"What's that supposed to mean, E?"

She knew full well what the other woman was referring to. It was the one part of her past that she wanted to both forget and remember forever. A time full of regrets, that still pained her to this day. But also full of such joy and love, that she would give her life to never forget.

" _Do not read too far in to what I say Darling! Gail was very dear to all of us…"_

Her time with Edna, all those years ago, had been a very quiet time. Nothing happened during the day to day while she was there at all. Edna did absolutely no work, had no meetings, no business trips, and not even that many phone calls. At the time, she put it down to her being there and imposing. Edna often worked on some very top secret projects that she assumed would need to remain top secret regardless of her presence. Looking back on that time, she remembered things that she overlooked before. Her studio was stripped of all super suit prototypes, her designs were all boxed up and taken away, there were often messages for her about half completed projects and Edna was completely absent from it all. The only input she provided was names of younger, less experienced, designers who she recommended in her place. At the time, Helen assumed she was delegating and making room for newer and more important projects. As time went on, she began to realise that she wasn't the only one taking the news badly.

" _She was far too pure for this world, Helen… We both know that…"_

Helen was taken aback by Ednas use of her _real_ name. It was not very often that the smaller woman took the theatrics down a notch, but she suddenly seemed a lot more human.

" _But, it has been 15 years my dear… The past that has hurt us before can only do so again if we allow it to…"_

The stinging in Helens eyes had began to intensify, as she continued to hold back the tears she knew were there. She knew Edna was right. She hated it, but she knew it. She opened her eyes and let the tears fall freely as she took a very shaky and tired breath.

"How do I stop missing her, E? How do I stop… stop feeling?"  
" _You never stop missing the ones you truly love, my dear."_


End file.
